Sunday, January 19, 2014

An author who should not be humble: Renee Rose

It's a tremendous honor to welcome for this episode of "Emily's Questions" one of the very first, and very most generous friends I made when I started publishing my erotica last March. Words can't express my gratitude to Renee for her help and her advice. The excerpt Renee's chosen from Humbled, which is just wonderful, is one of my very favorite moments from the book, as well!

Thank you, Em, for having me on your blog today! You asked the thought-provoking question “Do you think of BDSM and/or spankophilia as a practice or as an orientation, or as something else, and what does your answer mean to you?”

I had never considered my spankophilia to be an orientation until I began to crawl out of the closet as a spanking romance author this past year. I had this fear previously, that I might get kicked off the PTA or whispered about behind my back. Then I realized I would never become a successful author if I can’t own up to what I write.
I was explaining my thoughts to a friend who happens to be gay, and he made the analogy to the Gay Pride movement. It truly changed the way I think of TTWD. It is an orientation, hard-wired into me since birth. It did not stem from a traumatic event, or a parenting style, or lack of Daddy love. No amount of squelching or hiding will make it go away. It is my guaranteed on-button for sex, whereas vanilla sex can be hit or miss. Though I used to try, I no longer believe it can be “cured” or ignored without damaging effects and I now find the notion that there’s something wrong with it to be offensive.

Thinking of it as an orientation, rather than a kink or fetish puts it in a “sex-positive” light. Similar to homosexuality, an estimated ten percent of the population has a D/s orientation as their sexual preference, yet it is consistently mocked in mainstream culture, the way homosexuality once was (and still is in some circles). I can only hope as I gain more confidence in waving my freak flag and writing about characters like me, others can shake off their own shame around their orientation.

I guess it would be safe to say Jean-Claude, the hero of my new French Revolution spanking romance has a similar orientation. Here’s an excerpt of a conversation he has with Corinne, the heroine:
“Jean-Claude?” Her voice crackled in the silent room. 
He rolled over to face her. “Yes?” 
“Did you spank your wife?” 
He remained silent so long she thought he would not answer. “Yes,” he said at last. 
“Forgive me, does it pain you?” 
“Yes. But it is also a relief to speak of her to you.” 
She wondered if the “to you” meant her, in particular, but did not have the courage to ask. 
“Why did you punish her?” 
Jean-Claude rolled onto his back and put his hands behind his head. “It was almost always over silver. We never had enough money, you know, and we had different ideas about what it should be spent on. She would purposely disobey my wishes, accepting I would whip her for it, and remain determined with her decision.” 
In the darkness, she thought she saw a rueful smile on his lips. “It was hard to be angry with her, she would confess so humbly and offer herself up for chastisement.” 
“You liked punishing her.” 
His eyes slid sideways. “I guess I did--most times. She was so terribly sweet about it and she rarely cried, no matter how hard I punished. She only cried if I was truly angry--she knew, I suppose--and then she would weep before I even began. Those punishments I never finished.”

She had pressed the fingers of one hand over her sex, but dared not move them. She burned with curiosity about their punishments--did he rub his wife’s bottom and touch her between her legs during them? Did he take her afterward? and how? Was it possible to take a woman in the position she had been in that evening, bent over his lap? Irrational envy for the dead woman smoldered in her chest for the great intimacy she must have had with her tender blacksmith. She fell asleep with her hand cupping her mons, discreet fingers pressing and releasing on her sex as if playing a pianoforte.
Buy Now on Amazon or Amazon UK! Here's the blurb:
Sentenced to die at age eleven for stealing a pig, Jean-Claude receives an unexpected reprieve when a young aristocrat girl takes the blame instead. When the mobs of the French Revolution fall upon her château years later, Jean-Claude knows he must save her and repay his debt, but as they begin their long flight to safety he makes it clear he is not her servant and he will deal firmly with any disobedience. Though he initially intends to send her off by ship, the beautiful, feisty Corinne inspires a fierce protectiveness in Jean-Claude that makes it hard to say goodbye.

Corinne is alternately infuriated and attracted to the handsome peasant who has no qualms about turning her over his knee and spanking her bare bottom when she steps out of line. When he ends up joining her on a ship to New Orleans, their futures become inextricably intertwined, but can a common-born blacksmith and the daughter of a lord find enough common ground to make a permanent match?
And here's Renee's amazing bio: 
Renee Rose is a contemporary dance teacher,Feldenkrais Practitioner(R), energy worker and kinkster. Named Eroticon USA's Next Top Erotic Author in 2013, her books are all centered around her favorite kink: spanking. 
A lifelong writer, she has a B.A. in creative writing from Knox College, where she won the Davenport prize for both fiction and poetry, and the Lorraine Smith prize for literary criticism. She spent thirteen years in technical writing before she found a way to incorporate her deepest darkest spanking fantasies into fiction and express a part of her that longed to see the light. She is now passionate about supporting others in accepting and exploring their kink, whatever that may be. Please visit her blog and join the conversation! 
Check her out on: 

25 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for having me today, Em!!

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    1. Thanks so much for coming, Renee! I'm so sorry I've been AWOL all day!

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  2. Great post Renee! I totally get what you're saying. Some of our sexual "quirks" seem to begin early in life.

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    1. Yep, I was definitely born with mine! :) Thanks, Normandie!

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  3. Renee, I love how you talk about it as an orientation- as something not to be ashamed of. Thanks, Emily, for giving Renee a place to talk and such an interesting question to answer

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    1. Thank you, Joelle! It was a great question!

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  4. I totally agree with your analogy Renee. My sister is gay and I watched as her life fell apart and then finally came back together better when she came out after twenty years of marriage. It has helped me to be a little brave. I think if she can go through all that and come out ok then what can possibly happen to you from admitting you write spanking stories. I think what worries me more now is whether or not my writing is good enough, not the fact that they have spanking in them.

    LOVE the excerpt by the way :)

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    1. Thank you, Constance!! I think you should stand proud by your writing an your orientation. :)

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  5. Excellent, thought provoking post Renee! Thank you for sharing. I never really thought about it being an orientation before but this is so true of me too. I love the analogy to the Gay Pride Movement.

    Love the excerpt and how he described the differences between punishment and punishment when he is truly angry from the POV of both of them.

    Thank you Emily for hosting :)

    Hugs,
    Roz

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  6. I have always somehow known this spanking part of myself - even though I did not admit it to anyone including myself for many years - I do believe it was something I was born with...so I agree. Thank-you Renee and Emily for the interesting post

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  7. I agree that, for me, spanking and D/s are an orientation. I do not have an origin I can point to--I had spanking-centric thoughts from my earliest memories. Sex and romance for me are meaningless without spanking and caring discipline. Like I told my therapist, I would rather cut off my right arm than cut out this party of me. I don't feel a need to be cured, although it has taken me a long time to reach this level of acceptance. I do find that the greatest level of acceptance comes from the LGBT community, likely because they have faced similar prejudices. Like many people of minority orientations, I think my life might have been easier in some ways if I had been more "normal", but I would not be the same person I am now.

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    1. So very true, Johnna! I would never want to lose this part of me, either.

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  8. Thanks so very much for all these thoughtful comments, everyone. I feel exactly the same way Renee does, and, Johnna, you put it so very beautifully!

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  9. Wonderful interview, Renee! You rock!!!

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  10. I used to be really ambivalent about calling it an "orientation", but those days are long past (thankfully). I think there is way too much commonality in the stories of those of us who are kinky for this to be simply an aberration or something wrought upon us due to our upbringing (nurture rather than nature).

    While there are of course some who dabble in D/s or kink in general as a lark or for experimentation, I believe the vast majority of us are simply wired this way. It's a natural human variation, and I hope that with time more "vanillas" can open their minds (and their hearts) enough to see it as such:)

    Great question, Emily -- and I loved the excerpt, Renee!

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    1. Yes, good point about the commonalities. Thank you, Trent!

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  11. I agree that it's an orientation, but I don't feel as it's the same as homosexuality. While it is mocked in the mainstream, I have never felt any discrimination as a result nor has it affected my ability to legally marry or adopt a child. I can see similarities but I can't relate my experience to anything closely relating to what homosexuals must endure.

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    1. That's a really good point, and a reason why people I think shy away from talking about BDSM that way. But as LGBT gains ground in terms of rights, it seems like people who identify as LGBT are becoming more willing to think about BDSM as having similarities at least in terms of the way we think about our sexualities--though as you say certainly not with regard to social justice.

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    2. Yes, I echo what Emily said about the similarities being in terms of sexuality, not social justice.

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  12. Hi, Emily!

    Renee, I love your excerpt. There is so much honesty and longing - a bit of angst to know more. It's compelling.

    I really don't know whether spankophilia is a practice, an orientation or something else (kink, fetish, other). I suppose it can be any of those or a combination. I dug into it some more here, but I'm very opinionated and long-winded so I deleted it. I guess I can summarize it by saying I don't think it really matters, as long as the actual practice of it - the reality - does not include anyone being harmed physically or emotionally (practice of it/reality as opposed to engaging only in the fantasy part of it). I'm just glad people can read books about it, and come to the blogs where they can share and learn from each other in a supportive, respectful venue.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts on all of this!

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    1. Aw, I'm sorry you deleted your first post, and I agree with the one you left. :) Thank you!

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