Sneak peek: The First Victorian Notebook

In case you're now completely mystified by all the ins and outs of EXPLORATIONS, I made a special page just for purposes of that wonderful thing called disambiguation: A Guide to the Versions of EXPLORATIONS! And of course if you're just discovering the strange mixture of searing hot BDSM and labyrinthine whimsy that makes me tick, there's also EXPLORATIONS 101.

The matter at hand, however, is something I hope will please some number of readers: the Victorian material by itself, presented as if you were "me," taking it out of the old box your mother gave you and being scandalized just as "I" was. Here's a particularly scandalous bit: Emily has been chained, naked, in a very elegant salon, to await punishment.

Why the chain? Clearly the collar and cuffs (an assembly I later learned to call a ‘virtue-keeper’) were symbolic of the rule I had broken, my hands placed (in an attitude of prayer, even) where they might not transgress the private domain prepared for Mr. Wilkes. At the thought, my loins burned anew. I looked down again at that private domain, smooth and bare, where only the barest hint of my virtue was visible as I knelt on the carpet. Then, unbidden, the aide-mari came into my mind: what would it be like to put it on? to watch my chamber-maid take it from its little case, holding it between thumbs and fore-fingers, as I waited, naked in my dressing-room, my charms carefully shaven so that the little garment might be their only covering? In my mind’s eye I took the front waist-band from May and brought it to my own waist; now the little furrow of my maiden virtue was just covered by the silk and lace, hanging narrowly down in front of my pudenda. May knelt behind me; what would she see, as I must open my thighs to let her reach between them to take the other waist-band? would her fingers brush against my charms as she raised the back panel behind me? And when the clasps were fastened, when I felt my charms enclosed—how could I avoid feeling that my secret places were mine no longer—that they belonged to Mr. Wilkes? And when I felt his hand at my waist, opening the clasps. . . I sat back on my heels, and felt the sting of the strapping young women’s straps anew. The wet began to moisten my calves where they lay below my wanton charms.

And here's the book's blurb (buy the book here!):

Mrs. Smith was suddenly very matter-of-fact. "Very well, Miss Orn. It is my custom to test a new girl’s obedience immediately. Stand up, if you please, and allow me to assist you in removing your clothing. In order that there be no false pretense here, let me warn you that you will be required to remove every garment, including your chemise."  

My conscious mind now rose in open rebellion against the impulse that had had me give my word. How could I obey her? Why had I given my word to do so? Had I had any inkling she would ask such a thing?  

NOTE: This book comprises material previously published in the following books: Emily, Victorian Bride; Emily in the School for Wives; Emily Undressed; Emily's Bath; Emily's Morning; and EXPLORATIONS: Books 21-24. I here present it as a continuous story and without the intrusion of the modern narrative of my fantasy-tale, for readers who might be more interested in this Victorian material.  

In this notebook, imagined as passed down to me from my great-great-grandmother, Emily Orn tells the story of her first initiation into a great drama of BDSM in Victorian England. Under the tutelage of Mrs. Smith, trainer of submissive brides, she learns to know and to love her craving for shameful degradation and erotic submission.   

This book of EXPLORATIONS contains fiction elaborating the following sorts of fantasy that you may wish to avoid: Mf, ff, Ff, spanking, mild watersports. It's intended for over-18 audiences who, like me, are interested in exploring the lines between pleasure and pain, dominance and submission, and fantasy and reality. All characters depicted are consenting adults.